Winnings And Losers

Ok, so the Montana Democrats had a contest. I, along with another creative gentleman, won. We each got $50.00, which is a nice round of drinks that I fully intend to have tonight. And while bragging about winning is always fun, there’s more to this story than meets the eye.

You see, not only does my mother work for the illustrious “Brad’s Johnson“, she’s the head of the Lewis & Clark County Republicans. Did I mention I’m gay? Oh, but wait, there’s more.

Know how I found out I won? Mom got asked in the office if she knew I’d won by someone who’d been contacted by someone else who apparently had read the press release that went out from the Montana Democratic Party on Friday of last week. For the record, she didn’t even know I entered. My guess is that someone from the press called to get a quote from Brad’s Johnson about the contest because it’s a slow news week, Apple having announced the new iPods last week. Even better, the MDP hadn’t even managed to get their site updated as the press release about this contest was the last official duty of their outgoing communications director.

The press release followed by the request for comment to the reporter becomes even funnier because, let’s be real, Brad’s Johnson (nor any other part) wasn’t in the office, which is his normal routine. He might have the title of secretary of state, but he’s never in that office.

Alas, it seems he’s pissed at me. (HA! Brad’s Johnson is pissed! Get it? HA!) He might be pissed:

Whatever the reason, he’s pissed. I don’t care. Frankly, the people of Montana are pissed at him for the poor job he’s done and incredible lack of ability he’s displayed. So let him be pissed at me for my wit. That’s fair, fine and dandy.

However, there are some rumblings that life at work for my mom is going to be rough. And I have a few thoughts on that: I doubt it would come down to such childish behavior, but it might. I know the reason our society is as great as it is, can weather the storms of stupidity that periodically race through our history, and will get through the current debacles that abound, is because we have the freedom to speak our mind. Anyone who thinks that towing the party line is more important than exercising our rights has more in common with Putin than our Founding Fathers. I’m sure everyone would hate to find out that our state government was riddled with that crap, but I don’t know that anyone would be shocked, if only because people tend to already be pessimistic about government.

Anyone who has met me knows that I’m going to speak my mind, no matter what. Client meetings where I’ve been asked “What can you make with vinyl?” have elicited “Ass-less chaps for Pride.” from me with nary a blink or a pause. I have worn a shirt that says “No. Dude. Seriously. Fuck You.” to client meetings, lunches with business people, a school and a church. Freedom of speech is important to me, and I invite anyone who sees that shirt or hears my words to debate me on it. Yes, I’m on the edge, but that leaves more room at the middle for others.

If Brad’s Johnson is bent out of shape (curves left now? odd that) and he wants to debate his benefits against his deficits with me, I’ll gladly meet him at a podium, anytime.

That, of course, presumes he could bother to make it to Helena at some point.

Where are we going? And what are the handbaskets for?

2helenahandbaskets_imgBlogging is all the rage these days. It seems that everyone is doing it. In fact, it’s so popular that even my mother has picked it up. She’s funny and snarky and quite possibly illegal in 7 states, but there is no one else quite like her. She’s in Montana, pounding away at the insanity of the political process in a state that’s 4th largest in acreage and 4th smallest in population.

She may not win a Pulitzer this year, but she could easily claim a scalp or two, since they’ve got a:

  • Democrat for governor who is all about ripping up the land across the state so that all the coal can be used for fuel – very environmental forward, that guy
  • Republican Senator facing problems because he:
    1. shoots from the hip (like most Montanas)
    2. but keeps forgetting to remove the gun from his holster (unlike most Montanans), thus
    3. hitting his own foot almost every time
  • so his public appearances end with his foot in his mouth
  • whining about his wounds
  • just as if he was from North Dakota!

Regardless of the goings-on, she’ll have some opinion, usually dripping in her everyday’s-a-holiday-favorites — Frank, Intense and Mirth.

Categorized as mom